Doing Way Better

The last few days have been really good for Kenzie. It is a nice break from all of the havoc we had the week before. As I said before she does need the vyvanse and it does help her. Her mood is really good right now, but I have no idea for how long. I almost hesitate to write this because I am afraid it will jinx us. Well that's not right...God is in complete control and everything happens for a reason for those who love Him. This is the time when I start doubting again that she has bipolar. Aren't they suppose to swing in and out of the moods all day everyday? I guess that would be a question for other parents who have bipolar kids? So I am asking...do you all have times when your bp child seems almost normal? I guess she still does have all of her little quirks and maybe because it was so bad last week that this week seems so much better like almost normal. But it could be too that we are so use to living with all of it that we don't notice as much anymore. I will say that she has not had any rages or bad emotional meltdowns in the last couple of days. And she has not been that irritable either. So I guess I need to be thankful and take it when I can get it.

Her anxiety is still the same. The other night I realized that she was trying to manipulate me AGAIN right before bedtime. I realized that she is using this tactic to stall so finally, I asked her, " Why do you not want to go to bed?" Her reply at first was, "I do not know." Then I asked her what she was scared of and she said that she was afaid that somebody would take her in the middle of night. She tells us all of the time that this is the reason she says I love you so many times. She wants it to be her last words in case she is taken. She has now expanded this and says I love you to everyone including Addyson even if they are asleep. She sounds like John boy from "The Waltons". My sweeet husband reminded me that I need to be thankful that at 13 she still wants to say "I love you" to us. He is right and I am thankful but I know it is still not normal and that is want is disheartening.

Monday is the appointment with the new psychiatrist. I typed him a letter with all of the medications she has tried, the results and or reactions. I also gave him a summary of where we are today. I faxed it to him on Thursday. I hope he reads it before Monday, but if not, I am taking a copy. Please pray for us on Monday.